Wind Biatch (cont'd)

Okay, so continuing with Tunnel of Fire (read previous post first). So with our eagerness to get to Finnfest and out of Hellfire Tunnel, we went into the first convention room we saw. In this room, about half the size of a football field, were 10 geriatrics and a polka band. Unfazed by this, Christopher marches up the front to secure us a table right next to the dance floor. Within two minutes, Christopher and Jessie were up on the massive dance floor (sparsely populated by three other couples), dancing to Finnish polka. Did it matter that they didn't know the steps? heck, no. That was their encouragement. After about 5 songs of about 2 minutes apiece, the band leader announces a tango. The other couples all sit down, but Jess and Christopher take to the empty dance floor. What ensured was the funniest 7 minutes of dancing to which I have ever borne witness. In a room full of 30 people (more had entered by this point), we being the only ones under the age of 80, Jessie and Christopher performed the sexiest, most elaborate and ridiculous tango on record. At one point Christopher picked up Jessie horizontally and spun her around in a 360. The highlight though was when Jessie broke off, walked backwards and beckoned Christopher to come to her while Christopher crawled across the dance floor toward her. Priceless. Afterward, about 3 different people came to ask the couple how long they'd been dancing together and where they learned to tango. The answers? 15 minutes and never, respectively.

Later that night, Christopher and Maki agreed to go to prom together. Considering I was banking on the fact that Christopher would be my date, Maki just made my hit list. The next night at dinner, we broke into an all-out catfight, involving flailing arms, pulling hair, and when Maki reached for my orange visor, well, I opened a can of whoop-ass on that. Plus some expletives.

Feeling lost and dejected in the aftermath of my trivial triumph against Maki (I mean, I still didn't have a date to prom), I decided to mix things up a little bit (this, after conspiring with some other trip members). It is a well-known fact that Dan and Kim are an item on the trip. Although it's never been formally announced, we do have footage of them making out on the plane right before jumping out (made all that much more hilarious by the fact that it's a subtle background shot; the camera was actually focused on Christopher at that point). Knowing that they probably hadn't discussed going to prom together, we formulated and executed a master plan.

This morning, right before everyone left the church on the ride, I said: "Can I have everyone's attention please? I would like to have your attention as I ask someone to prom." Then, I walked over to Dan, bent down on one knee, took his hand, and asked him to prom. Priceless. This is the one time on the trip when I wished I could be spectator and not participant. Needless to say, it was awkward and Kim was horrified as Dan reluctantly agreed to escort me to prom. But hey, it's not like he had to.

Later today, Kim said, "I'm not going to prom." Christopher, hearing this, replied sassily, "Good, then Kathy's getting laid." I wasn't actually there to hear it, but how priceless. I love it that bad attitudes about prom are getting met with sass. And ostracisation. You are lame if you don't come and actively participate in this prom.

Other than that, not much else happened in Duluth. Today we had an 85-mile ride into Grand Rapids that resembled riding through a tornado. Apparently a front was moving in from the west, creating serious winds. I'm so over getting mad about it, I just laugh. At one point we pulled over and took a video with Craig yelling over the wind as behind him the 2-foot tall grass bent to horizontal under its force.

I got in around 3:30, but my last post was interrupted as Dan took the van to take smoothies out the sweeps, who were way behind. Part of my motivation was to be there for the sweeps, who were heros for bringing everyone in today. Mostly though I just wanted to see the look on Kim's face when my prom date and I drove by in the van. Believe me, I am milking this for all it's worth.

Shazaam.

Make that wind your bitch.

I last wrote from the small town of Hinckley, MN.  I thought it was a wonderful town, replete with a quik-e-mart, high school, and TWO thrift stores.  In fact, I found the best buy all trip: a neon orange visor.  It is the most god-awful piece of sun protection...i.e. something only my mother would wear.  It reminds me of this card I once saw in the campus bookstore.  On the cover is a girl's head shot prom photo.  Her hair resembles a massive helmet.  The word that comes to mind is dowdy.  On the inside of the card: Her hair was her chaperone.  The implication is that her hair basically wards off the entire male species; no fear of catching any guy stealing milk from THAT cow.  Anywho, my visor pretty much accomplishes  the same feat.  It's so heinous, I'm surprised anyone can bear to look at me while it's on.  I wear it religiously.

Also in Hinckley was the circus.  Yes, the circus came to town.  How fortuitous that we were there considering it was only in town for one night.  Tickets were $14, which we agreed was far too much.  But the best things in life are free as while we asked about tickets, the previous show let out, bringing with it a massive elephant.  Many photo opportunities were seized.  All of them with my orange visor.

While I loved the backcountry charm of Hinckley, Craig showed an extreme distaste.  "Get me out of here" became his mantra for the evening. 

From Hinckley we headed to Duluth.  Here too Craig had strong opinions, this time about the weather.  Apparently 63 degrees was too cold for the Chicagoan.  I however was in rapture over the cool, breezy city.

Also in Duluth was the first synagogue of the trip.  I was anxious for some normal hosts, ones without dogmatic harmonized prayer songs (St. Paul), come-hither Jesus drawings (Palermo), Jesus movie posters (Camden), or massive Christian rock lyrics displayed in the dining hall (Westfield).  Members of Temple Israel (Reform) were incredibly down-to-earth.  We came and they said, "Let's eat, hear about your mitzvah, and then let's eat some more."  My kind of people.  

As Hinckley had a circus, Duluth had Finnfest.  That's right, this weekend is the annual North American Finnfest, held in Duluth.  Well we just had to go.  My personal motivation was to see the president that looks like Conan O'Brien, who unfortunately was not scheduled to make an appearance before this morning.  

So Wednesday night, Christopher, Jessie, Maki, Ian and myself walked 2 miles into the heart of Duluth to find the festival.  After a very difficult time finding it, we were directed to go the convention center across the highway via skywalk.  As Duluth has weather similar to Yetti's cave in the winter, everything is connected via tunnels.  In the summer, they are primarily used to traverse across the highway.  However, someone must have missed the memo to turn the heat in the tunnels down.  The tunnel was so unbearably hot, Christopher nicknamed it the Tunnel of Fire.  

Sorry, we'll have to continue this later; I'll describe my current predicament tonight.

East!

So we're headed east into Duluth and so excited as its the one time when we are sure to have an easy ride thanks to that wonderful little word: tailwind. But did the wind blow in the prevailing direction of west-to-east today? Of course not. Headwind. All day.

I would get angry, but I know John P. already gets mad enough for the rest of us. John gets personally mad at these acts of nature--which makes for some funny comments. Kudos, J-Muff.

I left out yesterday details about our scavenger hunt, which Christopher formulated in the hopes of breaking up the day. I however was not group photographer, so I'll direct everyone to Craig's blog for better updates/info on that topic. I will however include the one photo I was in that day (see below).

Also, Craig's blog was more detailed in describing the costume contest which took place a week ago. I do however have a small photo of everyone's costume. And I will add that Craig's blog did not emphasize enough how arbitrary the judging was. Allow me: the judging was lame, IAN. For someone who has something witty (and often critical) to say about everything, your M.C.-ing job stunk.

For the most part nothing big has gone down since yesterday. Craig predicted that as soon as we crossed the Mississippi, stuff would start to go down. We've all kept it together though. Well, I would probably be the one exception as I opened a can of whoopass on someone for poor work ethic the other day. It seems to have made a difference though. Shazaam.

Last, I will mention something Anson brought up at presentation the other night. No one from our group has ridden in the van yet. It's been nearly 1800 miles and not one person has rode in the van. Apparently the administration didn't believe our leaders when they told them this was so. And no other bike and build trip has ever made it this far without it happening. It just goes to verify: this is one awesome group of people.

"The Perfect Fusion", "Dolly Parton", "Rider and Camelbak" and "Jasmine"
Two of the scavenger items: "person with a shawl" and "imitating a statue." Killing two birds with one stone!

BBP '08 (reference to PP'06)

Quickly, photos:
The Lakefront Trail in Chicago!
The Pg-13 version involves me groping Kate
Stopped at a traffic light. Pen's slightly frustrated.
You get it where you can.
Cool photo of Erik.
Fording a massive river.
I wrote this; very proud.
Who you gonna call? Why, me of course!

First off, big shout out to Laura's grandmother, I hear my blog is being read and there are positive reviews. I'm only sorry I can't update more often (and with pictures). And I'm sorry that the REAL WORLD reference was somewhat confusing (see previous posts). Thanks for the feedback.

So we're in St. Paul right now, chillin' in the Lee's crib (we have host families tonight). Some major updates include the most exciting thing to be planned on this trip: Bike and Build Prom 2008. Calm the breathing, sit down, I know this is a lot to handle.

Basically, much in keeping with the theme of the costume contest, everyone will be responsible for finding a date and cheap outfit to attend prom, tentatively scheduled on July 28th. Bonus points for the person who shows up with a local. And no, Kevin, you can't bring Isaiah's sister.

Tickets will be 50 cents to help pay for the cost of decorations and food (that, along with the $20 donation from my lotto winnings. Yes, Christopher and I played the Wisconsin lotto 2 days ago and I scratched off the winning $30). The theme is HARVEST MOON, which is in keeping with the sights/time of the trip (and I figure corn stalks will be pretty easy to come by). Also, it was a theme Christopher came up with for his Prom (am I at all surprised Christopher was on Prom planning committee? no.), but was eventually passed over for "November Rain." Redemption is ours.

So if you are reading this and thinking, "oh, my child/friend/stalk victim on this trip will never go for this," then think again. I have heard some whining from riders about how lame prom was. I intend to nip that in the bud. Yes, prom is over dramatized and built up to no end. Pressure exists to get a date, find an outfit, figure out which group of friends you're joining, finding a restaurant, limo, hotel, whatever. Then there's paying for it all. This is not that kind of prom. You just have to venture into some thrift stores to find an outfit and show up. The fun's on me.

Actually, now that I think about it, this isn't prom, it's anti-prom. It's going to correct for all that frivolous debauchery you experienced in high school and just be plain debauchery.

Get ready, kids. BBP '08 is coming. SHAZAAM!

In other news, the rides have been somewhat strenuous mentally and physically of late. From Madison we rode into Gays Mills. I was one of the cool, smart kids who stayed up the night before for the midnight premiere of THE DARK NIGHT. I almost didn't make it as I took a nap from 8:30 to 11:30 (the showing was at 12:20). I however had chosen to sleep in a rather secluded part of the church, a room where the priests robes were kept. I also assumed that we would leave that night around 11:45. So when I woke up at 11:35, I was shocked to see the number of voicemails on my phone. I checked my text messages first, and saw that Craig had wrote "Where are you?!" Thinking he had written it moments before, I wrote "I'm coming downstairs as we speak." Two second later, Craig called.

"Uh, we're already at the movie."
"What?!" I screamed in shock and horror.
"Uh, yeah, Christopher's going to come back and get you. Be in the church parking lot in 20 min."

Apparently, the group had hoped to leave around 11 for good seats. I was nowhere to be found. Oh, horrors! I'd been left behind! But all we well as the group who stayed at the theatre brought tickets and saved seats as Christopher tore through the night in the massive group van. Had I seen that white, unmarked van rip through the deserted streets that night, I would not have thought "He's on his way to see Batman." Rather, I would have said, "That driver is on crack and he thinks he is Batman."

But all was solved as we arrived in our seats in time to see the 20 min worth of previews before the film actually began. After the film, we got all of two hours of sleep before waking up to begin the 102-mile ride.

I however was in for a treat as I looked at the cue sheet to see the words:
"Sweeps: Kathleen and Jessica. If you see these two today, give them a hug or a smile, as it's going to be a long one for them."

We woke up at 5:30. We left the parking lot at 7:30. We rode 111 miles through terrain akin to western North Carolina. We arrived at the church that evening at 8:30.

Bedtime: 9 pm.

The sweeps, if you are unaware, are the two riders assigned to the back of the pack to encourage anyone having trouble and basically make sure everyone makes it in that night. The day for sweeps is, by definition, longer than everyone elses'. It was quite a long one (including an 8-mile detour, although nothing compared to Anson's ride of 130 miles due to errors on the cue sheet), but I was blessed with a great sweep partner (Jess!) and surprisingly good energy despite my abbreviated snooze time the previous evening.

Today's ride was fun as we had a scavenger hunt throughout the ride. Photos were proof of seeing/getting an item. Awesome things we got:

-one non-domesticated mammal: gorilla at the local zoo
-cyclist on a motorcycle: Jess jumping on a random motorcycle within someone's yard in a period of 30 seconds
-unicorn: storming every antique store between Pepin and St. Paul, eventually settling on a picture from a book in the local library

Well, I better stop being a-social and join the host family upstairs.

Overwhelmed!

I'm going to have to apologize again as I will have to defer real updates until the next post. I've been getting behind, but often posting comes at the price of doing other activities in the current town. That and the 1-hour computer limits most libraries have instituted.

We're in Madison, using one of our 3 precious days off. Mom came up to Chicago and I was blessed with a bed for the evening. Having only been to Chicago very rarely, I was shocked and amazed at how wonderful the city was. I'm determined to live there at some point.

Also in recent news is the most fabulous costume to come out of Bike and Build costume contests: the human bladder. That's right, our most recent biking challenge (put in place to break up the monotony of a 70-mile day) was a costume contest. Christopher and I made a Camelbak bladder out of a dry cleanin gbag, blue trash bags, and vaccuum hose. Brilliant. Pictures to come soon.

Other than that, there's been violent Teletubbie encounters, river fordings, notes from high school boys left on cars, parties in Janesville Wis., bike clinics, awesome mail stops (thanks, Nana), cotton candy for breakfast (thanks, Mr. Lee), lunch in bogs, town hall meetings, Kangaroo court, and all manner of craziness. It's been great. I promise to elaborate soon, but for right now I have to go out and enjoy it! (I assure you the blog entries will become more prevalent as N. Dakota and Montana approach, provided computers exist out there.)

Shazaam.

The Real World: Bike and Build

So I promise I'll have a post where I will actually update you on what I've been doing, but for now I'm going to comment on a more pressing matter.

In the past week, as riders now know more than just each other's names (i.e. personalities, quirks, and smell when they haven't showered for a while), subtle changes have taken place. Since the novelty of riding and moving around has worn off, our focus has shifted to the personal drama. Kate came up with a brilliant analogy: The Real World. The Real World, for those of you who haven't watched, is a reality series in which a bunch of random, dramatic, and self-centered individuals are thrown into a house for months at a time. Cameras follow them every hook-up, catfight, and bitch slap of the way.

Now take Bike and Build. Thirty people are tossed together for 10 weeks. Every day they are subject to the most extreme physical duress. They live in close quarters with limited amounts of personal time and space. Throw in some sleep deprivation and bad weather, and you have a ticking time bomb on your hands. This is the situation we face.

Now I'm torn. I think things could continue to go as well as they have. This trip has been blessed with a massive number of easygoing people and positive attitudes. But I also think it's naive to deny that some of us (including, and perhaps especially, me) are going to get cranky and fight with one another. Fortunately though, this trip has Craig to all keep us laguhing.

Anyways, this post is more of a venting/ponificating session. Sorry to vomit thought on the page.

If anything major happens on Real World: B&B, I'll let you know. Like when Kim and Dan become an item or when someone realizes their sleeping bag was purposefully left at the last church. But I've said too much already. Shazaam.

Oh, and more pictures!

Craig at the U.S.S. Niagra

Kathy meets her Waterloo.
"You will never guess where we are. Ever." Ian, Penn and I at the Rutherford B. Hayes house.
This high-maintenance poodle with painted pink toenails. Seriously.

PICTURES!!!

Behold the Beacon. It set a major precident as that was how we spent our first night together.

I was so scared of this stupid costume when I was younger.

Girls' day out

Me, Kim, Craig

Shoveling for five hours the day before made me almost drop my bike in multiple times.
Missing lunch that first day. We carry chalk with us in order to mark the route for riders behind, but often end up writing messages.

Flea market in New Hampshire. Full of people pedaling crap I would not touch with a 10-ft pole. One guy came up to me trying to sell me a hooka pipe to attach to my camelbak. He had obviously been smoking too much hooka.

Dan and Christopher, trip leaders. Here, a butterfly landed on Dan and Christopher becgan to serenade it.

The butterfly alighted (i.e. was forced) onto Christopher's nose.

Craig's Duck Basket

Zack! Save yourself! Wear gloves when touching that.

Wringing out other people's chamois.

Born and Bred.

I am proud to say this was entirely my idea.

I woke up to find this picture on my camera.

Yes, these are my friends.

This bike shop in Vermont had chickens roaming around the backyard.

You can thank me for that design.

Priceless. I whipped out my photo to take an action shot of john going over the pass and accidently took a shot of myself mid-climb.

Best road sign ever.

With Craig on the ferry to New York.

Lunch on the Hudson.

Come Hither Jesus. The signature reads: "With Love, J"

Spelling in middle America.

Niagra!

Fireworks on the falls!

The Bike and Build calendar idea is most wholeheartedly rejected. And Isaiah, please lets keep that tan under wraps.

Hellloooooooo Cleveland!

Best lake party. Ever.

The sunset couldn't really be captured.